You know what really grinds my gears?

Ha! I apologize, I couldn’t help myself from using that phrase.

But really though.

I live a life of constant fear. Fear of being different and unique and to stand out because I know people are going to judge me.

Even though I have that fear I still dress differently. Sometimes my clothes don’t match. Sometimes they match way too much. If that’s even a thing. Sometimes I change a million times (probably about 3 times, I’m just being extra). But there are times when I look at myself in the mirror and say, “Fuck it, I don’t really care what anyone thinks or says.” That’s what everyone should say to themselves prior to walking out.

We spend too much time worrying about what people are going to say honestly and that’s no way of living.

One of my all time favorite things to say at work, at home, with friends and on social media is, “Don’t judge me!” and it’s exactly like that. Yelling it. It’s meant to sound like I don’t give a fuck but I do and I say it to make the other person realize they are judging me for me being me. Which is totally not fair by the way. Why should I be made fun or or put down for something that I’ve said or something that I’m wearing? I shouldn’t so please stop. This world can be too harsh sometimes and we’re not taught in school how to own our shit.

Another thing is. WE ARE ALL ENTITLED TO OUR OWN OPINIONS, LIKES, AND DREAMS! DON’T JUDGE SOMEONE FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE OR WHAT THEY LIKE. And don’t change who you are to impress someone because I’m sure the original you is so much better and cooler.

While we’re in the topic of judging. When someone asks if I’ve seen a specific film or listened to a certain band and I have absolutely no clue of who they are talking about or what film they speak of you have no right of yelling, “WHAT! YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THAT MOVIE???” or my favorite, “HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW WHO ___________ IS!!?” You don’t know my life, end of story. And I don’t know about you but I was pretty much brought up with Disney movies and basic cable which didn’t play up to date movies by the way. I completely didn’t live under a rock either. I don’t consider myself to be a movie person now and most certainly not then when I was younger.

In my opinion, the people who judge are jealous of the person they are judging. Because they themselves (the judge-y person) don’t have the balls to wear or whatever the case is the person they’re judging is or said. Did that make sense? I’ve caught myself doing that too. With all truthfulness, I’ve always wanted bigger boobs so I judge a lot of these women out there wearing really tight shirts or low cut shirts like, “Look at this big titty hoe!” when in reality I’m like, “Well damn, I wish I had the same size boobs, with my boobs in that same dress I look like a 12 year old boy!” Why do women do that though? We seriously have a problem with that. Instead of giving dirty looks or dodging dirty looks we should just smile and wave. Like the penguins from Madagascar. And I mean the movie by the way.

I’ve lost count of all the times I’ve took a picture of myself or had someone take a picture of me in public and I’ve felt self-conscious of the people walking by looking at me take a picture. Because I see the people around me looking. Sometimes it’s obvious they are talking about me with their not so subtle “look at her” tactics. You know when someone talks about you, they look at you and right away turn to their friend and then that friend turns to look at you. Good job you’ve just made it obvious your talking about me. And the bad thing is, you don’t know if they’re gushing (in a good way) about your outfit or your shoes or your hair or your makeup OR talking shit about your whole wardrobe that made you late because you took forever trying to find THAT outfit for THAT occasion. And once I see they’re watching me I stare back to let them know that I’m watching them talk shit about me. If looks could kill!! But what if they were liking my vibes and here I am throwing darts with my eyes?? Damn, I swear it’s hard being a female sometimes.

In simple words, let’s all stop being judge-y and not give a fuck! Buy that one dress or top you’ve been wanting to buy but too afraid because of what people would say. Unless it’s something extremely inappropriate then let’s have a bit of dignity while there is any left.

Have you every judged someone and felt really bad after doing so because you knew deep down you were jealous?


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