Confessions and Rules of A Bride in Distress

If you have planned a wedding you know how expensive it can get.

My big day was yesterday. I know, what am I doing here writing this out instead of laying out in the beach. Well, there was just no more money. We’re broke and barely paid off the wedding 48 hours prior to our event.

As a young girl my family would visit our downtown area for errands every once in a while. Our city isn’t known for it’s high buildings but there was always one that stuck out to me. The Double Tree Hotel. The top floor was nothing but huge windows all around the building. On our way to downtown I would glance at the building and focus on the top floor. It became a dream to have my wedding there one day.

I remember telling my mother, “I’m going to get married there one day.” and her remark was always, “well, you’re going to have to find yourself a rich man!”

That’s not the case but he still helped me make it work. I had my wedding at the top floor of The Double Tree Hotel yesterday and honestly it was nothing close to the dream I held in my head for years.

I was disappointed. We spent a year and a half planning and paying for this lavish wedding to happen only for me to think, “Should we have invested our money in something else instead?”

If you’re reading this and you were part of our wedding sorry, not trying to throw shade but you did stress your girl out a bit.

Rules (as per myself) for a successful happy wedding:

  1. If you have a court make sure it’s not a ridiculous amount. We are all adults and I get it, sometimes we have commitments on that day BUT make an even bigger commitment to take care of those things prior to the wedding. Make plans to spend the day with the bride. You were chosen with careful consideration and if you’re needed at a certain place at a certain time BE THERE ON TIME.
  2. Also, on sticking to the court subject. It can get difficult to coordinate with everyone, and get approvals on certain things. A smaller court is less stressful honestly. I don’t know why I had 7. I love you all but you guys drove me crazy that day.
  3. Again with the court. DO NOT stress the bride on petty things that YOU can figure out yourself.
  4. Make sure you are 100% with every vendor about the times and the coordinations with the hall and other vendors. Half the time I was stressed because the vendors would call me, text me and email me for certain things. I get it though, they’re getting paid to please our likings and to make our day a bit “smoother”.
  5. If you know your partner drinks a lot then make sure you get a bit tipsy too to avoid any fights or fuckery with your new spouse. We all know being sober around someone who is wasted is obnoxious.
  7. Don’t leave your new spouse eat, dance and greet your guest alone. You’ve just become one and yet here you are away from each other during the reception.
  8. It’s your wedding and you can cry if you want to. Ceremony, toasts, and anything that brings you joy….or pain.
  9. The night of your wedding (after everyones gone home) is IMPORTANT, make it a night to remember with your new spouse.
  10. No matter how much you planned or how much money you put into it HAVE FUN! We had a total of about 180 guests planned to come but seriously about 80 came and that made me very sad and bothered.

What matters is the few important people that were in attendance. Thanks to those people who travelled from far just to see us walk down the aisle and to celebrate our love for each other and God. That day should be 100% about you and your new spouse and NO ONE ELSE!

Enjoy the day regardless of all the downfalls you never thought would show up (unlike the rest of the 100 people you invited). You are going to be stressed, it’s inevitable. It’s a big day that you will remember for the rest of your life and it’s normal to want to make it as perfect as possible. In my case, as close to the dream you had when you were younger.

This should only be a one time deal, make it count.

Do you consider yourself to be a “Bridezilla” the day or your big day?

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