I’m on a mission.
I have a certain item I need to find.
An item that does not quite pertain to me. Loads of paperwork that belong to someone else. Personal, work and school related. All in separate piles.
The search begins with annoyance.
Why would anyone store useless paperwork from years ago?
The item is no where to be found. So on to the next pile I go.
It’s chaos in its most organized form and only that person knows what lies within.
But during your search you find items that stab your heart…repeatedly. Over and over.
And it hurts. But you can’t stop reading…digging.
Digging yourself deeper and deeper.
You had a mission to find it.
And now you’ve found more and unnecessary items that are irrelevant to the search in the first place. Hurtful items.
It’s been a while. A very long while but here I thought differently back then of this person. It wasn’t the case with them of me.
I don’t know where to look any more and I doubt my eyes and poor heart can take much more.
At this point I can’t help it.
I’ve drank the poison far too long. The most toxic of them all. The past.
Although it’s a beautiful thing to remember the past and to speak of it, it hurts to relive it when the dark ones roam your life and thoughts.
I’m on a mission and I will conquer.
-L
