This here is it.
Because I honestly don’t want to pay another BS fee, I’m leaving.
One whole year sharing my life and my most personal thoughts, I kinda figured something different. Wanting to be successful and well-known takes time, patience and a lot of dedication. It’s not in me I guess. It never is honestly.
I’m tired. I’m done being viewed as number two or even number five sometimes. That’s not what I saw growing up picturing an adult me. I was side tracked to another world and it affected my future and my dreams (I don’t recall any of them at this point).
I rushed through a lot of things in my life and the result was….well rushed. We all know that anything that is rushed isn’t done correctly, or at least that’s what my mom used to tell me.
I’m done viewing life through the backseat. Saying that in my head over and over scares me but it’s needed.
Continuing this path none the less but in a different platform. A more personal quiet platform for my eyes only. I get a great feeling within me when I write here, don’t get me wrong but I just don’t see it getting any where.
A few things suck at the moment and I see it as a sign to start something new (as I said when starting this earlier this year). Something that benefits me and my well-being. I need to grow internally before reaching out in real life. Getting an idea and getting the feel for it before jumping in with two feet at once.
I wish for many things but mainly for happiness within me. Peace and tranquility with my mind. When I’m consumed by something it takes hold of all of me in a an instant and lingers for a while. Then the side of me that is not pleasant unfolds pushing away anything that gets close.
This has been an enjoyable time and I will most likely be back but much more later. I will recall the silliness and the sadness of my words I once wrote when I start to miss it but look forward to what I have started.
Off to find myself and discover the meaning of happiness and life.